Love Remembers

We, as people, make our way through each and every day. These days that our lives consist of are made up of millions of small moments and happenings that shape us into who we are, who we want to be, and show us who we don't want to be. Some of the smaller things go unnoticed at the time, but love remembers. It doesn't matter what kind of love it is, self love, love for your friends, love for another ... it makes no difference; it remembers.

You can try and try to forget something that happened, but love will always remember. This is one of the most horrifically beautiful parts of love. Each and every occurrence in your life that is centered around love will stay with you forever. Maybe it's the look on his face as the fight ends and he walks the other way. Maybe it's the sparkle in his eye when he brushes your arm and says hello. Maybe it's the way his hands move when he holds her. It doesn't matter, good or bad, cherished or regretted, love still remembers.

So maybe that's why the little things matter so much. Maybe that's why it's possible for life to be made up of all these insignificant things. Because if love didn't remember, then where would we be? Who, if not love, would remember all of these little things, and who, if not love, would shape us into what we desire to be? We would have nothing, we would be nothing, if love didn't remember.

Maybe that's why. Maybe that's the reason it's all worth it. And just maybe, if you're lucky, the way those words play over and over in your head, the way you hear each and every instance again and again, is all worth it because of the deeper sense of love and belonging that it comes from.

Love remembers, and that makes alot of the small things in life worth it, but at the same time it also makes alot of things hurt again and again. It will always remember the way his eyes sparkle and the way his touch feels. It will always remember how great it felt to be with him, to be entangled, to be together. Love will always remember the feel of his fingertips, or the way the air tasted fresher when you were with him. All of the greatness that was ever experienced will always be there with you. But at the same time, love also remembers the things that you'd rather it didn't. It remembers the way he walked away as he left, it remembers how the tears felt as they just kept coming down, it remembers the taste of the bottle that you thought your salvation may have been hiding in. It also doesn't forget the void of silence when he didn't call, nor does it let the sound of his laugh escape your brain.

This remembrance forces many different emotions onto us. It reminds us what it was like to have this feeling of utter acceptance and sheer happiness, but at the same time it limits our abilities to find it again. It is this inability to forget that makes it so that no matter how hard you close your eyes, the visions don't go away. They're permanently there. Those times that you close your eyes but get no rest or relief, that's because love remembers. Those other times that you lie in the arms of the one you love and feel completely at peace, like you never again want to move, that's because love remembers.

Memories, those that we cherish along with those that we regret, shape every single aspect of us. They change every ability in us to find satisfaction in anything.

Don't ever let a bad situation take your memories from you. But at the same time, don't get caught up in them. They are there for a reason, to help you to move on when you need to, and to hold on when you don't think you can hold on any longer. Love doesn't remember so as to inhibit the production of your life, love remembers to show you that there are things stronger than loss and death. Love remembers to show you that you can always keep going. But love, my friends, does not remember so that you can get caught up in what happened. That is not what memories are for. So in turn, I guess the point of this is to never let your memories fall from your grasp, they change you for better and for worse, but they are there because you are loved, and this is what makes them so great ... but also never let your memories hold you back from what you really want, there is a balance, and that is why love remembers. We hold onto these things so that we have something to look back on when we need to, but not so that we can dwell in them and miss out on what is happening right now. Memories are for crying when you haven't shed a tear in too long, they are for laughing when the tears won't stop coming, they are for smiling when you'd thought that you'd forgotten how. This is what love remembers for.

"Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose."
~The Wonder Years

If it is love that remembers, then why is it so hard in the absence of love and in the presence of hate, to forget?