Reasons, Seasons, and Lifetimes

Today was a snowday. I love snowdays ... except for the whole "stuck inside with your family all day" part. I hate that part.

My brother is the single most annoying person in the whole world. I honestly can't deal with him and neither can the rest of my family on certain days. It hurts, to not be able to deal with a part of your family, it's baggage. It's a day to day struggle. Some days are worse than others, but it's never as bad as it could be ... and that's the part that people forget to remember. But whatever, I guess everyone has their own baggage. What bothers me though, is when people think they understand. No one truly understands anyone else's life. You can't stand on the outside of another person's life and tell them that they have it good, or that everything isn't that bad, or that it's all going to be alright ... because truly, no one else has any idea at all. I mean, I know that I have a good life, my parents kill themselves every day to give me everything that I have, and I can never truly thank them enough. But just like with any other situation, there is baggage that no one else sees. But what would life be without baggage? Life isn't meant to make you happy all the time. You can't know true light until you've experienced true dark.

In this world, there are millions upon millions of people. So why, then, in our lives, do we only come upon a fraction of them? I believe this is because each and every person is sent into your life with a purpose. Although each purpose is different, there are really only three main groups of them. Some people are sent into your life for a reason, some for a season, and a select few for a lifetime. This purpose is what differentiates between the types of relationships in our lives. The problem with this is, you don't always recognize which type of relationship this is right away, and this causes problems. This, this not always seeing, is where people run into trouble.

When someone comes into your life for a reason, it is because you need something. Maybe you're not feeling well, maybe you've lost a loved one, or maybe there is a need that must be met. These people are miracles. They come into your life just as you hit rock bottom, and they are there to assist you through the hard times that you are facing. The only problem with these types of relationships are that these people, these miracles, suddenly leave your life. Sometimes there's a fight, sometimes they move, and sometimes they die. Regardless of how it ends, it always does end. And now, it's time to move on. It's your time to be someone's miracle.

There are certain people that come into your life for a season. These people are Godsends. They come at a time when there is a lesson that needs to be learned, or an experience that needs to be had. These people bring you peace, they make you laugh, they make you cry, and in all of these things, they teach you something. They stay in your life just long enough to show you these very important things, and then, just as they appeared, they are gone.

But it's the ones who come into your lifetime that truly change you. These people are angels, actual angels in human form. There is no other way to describe them. From these angels, you learn skills and lessons that allow you to build a life. Without the things that you experience with these people, you would not be who you are. And although these people are sent into your life to teach you about life and about love and about relationships, they come with a job for you to do. Your job is to accept whatever lesson this person comes with and to commit yourself to that lesson. Your job is also to take that person, and love them with everything you have. It doesn't matter who they are, or what they look like, or where they come from. What matters is that they're there for you every step of the way. Your job is to be there for them, to laugh with them, to cry with them, to hurt with them, to heal with them, and most of all, to take every single ounce of what you have and be willing to give it to them.

The most important thing in life, though, is to take the people that are in your life and be thankful for them each and every day. It doesn't matter whether they're in your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime ... the piece of themselves that they give to you will stay with you forever. What matters is that they're in your life at all. You'll find out in the long run who is there for what, but for now, all that matters is that you cherish each and every day with them.

So friends. They're incredible; each and every one of them. The thing is though, the hardest part of friendship is knowing who is truly a friend, and who is just an acquaintance; because there really is a difference. Friendship is so much more than spending time together or having some of the same interests. Friendship is a bond that has its roots in each person's soul. The coolest part about this is that you know when it's there. There's no mistaking that feeling. That effortless way that you can tell them anything, since it doesn't matter what you say because they're there for you through the good and the bad. It's the way their eyes light up when they smile at you, and the way yours do when you smile back. It's that sense of longing when you're not with them. It's the way those stupid fights that end some relationships are just speed bumps, and the way that they are resolved as soon as you commit yourself to the truth. Those are the things you feel when someone really means something to you, that's true love.

Love comes in many forms, but there are few times in life when it is true. You know when it's true though, you feel it deep inside you. Love is true in the eyes of your friends. They are always there for you, they accept you for who you are, and they give you a piece of them. Love is also true in the eyes of the person that you're meant to be with. You may experience this person more than once in your life, but there is only one that will stand the test of time and stay with you forever. The way that they take everything that they have, everything that they know how to give, and they give it to you. This is true love. The neverending commitment to teach, to learn, to love, to accept, to stay ... that's where true love comes from.

That probably didn't make sense at all. It made sense to me as I wrote it though, and that's what counts. It's helpful to write things like this. It really sets some of the deeper questions in life straight. I've been thinking alot lately, and I like it. It's what I enjoy doing ... figuring things out that other people struggle to understand. I feel like I get it sometimes, and it feels good. Sometimes, when you're down and you don't understand why things are happening the way that they are, you have to find something else to understand. The problem is that we always want what we don't have, what we can't have. Not understanding something just makes it more enticing, and until we conquer that fear, we are never going to be satisfied with what we have. Striving and wanting, at least for me, does not come from material possessions. What I want, I mean really want, is to understand things. Things that no one else understands. This understanding is what allows us to separate the truth from what we are taught to accept. This understanding is what wills us to give everything that we know how to another person. This understanding is what allows us to live each and every day.

"It is one of the severest tests of friendship to tell your friend his faults. So to love a man that you cannot bear to see a strain upon him, and to speak painful truth through loving words, that is friendship."
~Henry Ward Beecher

Think back, think about your life. When was the last time you truly made a difference in someone else's life?